My mammogram experience

A little over a year ago, close to my 35th birthday, my gynecologist handed me a script for a mammogram. Besides the realization that I am of age to have this procedure performed, the annotation that came along with being handed that slip of paper scared the shit out of me. My grandmother had breast cancer and survived it. She was diagnosed after the age of 65 which benefits my chances of not getting it. I was anxiety ridden with the unknown. I hate pain (I have no idea how I handled childbirth- TWICE!) and had heard it is in fact painful or from those who like to sugarcoat (eh hem...mom), rather uncomfortable. I was also not happy about the no deodorant thing. So...I have to have my boobs squeezed in a manner that surely is inhuman, arms up, nervous- with no deodorant...in someones face. Wonderful.

You would think someone (surely a woman) would have come up with an alternative way besides a booby torture chamber to check for breast cancer by now. I was hoping the discovery would happen before my appointment.

So, I go for the mammo (since nobody came up with the alternative like I hoped!) ...and, it's painful- not gonna lie...but to get through it- I kept telling myself that breast cancer would be a lot more painful... I knew I had to do it. The technician was sweet and sympathetic to my grimaces. Some men I dated never got as far as she did with my boobs. She handles them to get them in the machine just so, tells me not to move and goes to press the button of hell to release the machine down on my breast. Holy shit mother of god there has to be a better way I'm going to pass out...and just when I'm cursing myself for being born female and think I cannot handle another second, the machine releases my breast. I was put into many odd positions to get the necessary angles- some worse than others.Some not so bad at all. Ready to beg for mercy- I was overjoyed when she said she had gotten enough films. I got dressed, threw on the deodorant I stored in my bag, and left. I was proud of myself for being pro active about my health and thrilled that it was OVER! Or...so I thought.

A week or so later, I get a call from the office. "We need more films. Don't be alarmed...it could be nothing...we see a spot on one of your breasts and we need more films to see what it is". I was devastated...not only by the dreadful idea that everything I feared can be happening...but by the fact that I thought I was done and wasn't. I was so nervous about going for the testing and now had to do it all over again. I was so upset. So, I brave the office once again. I was sweating and shaking until I found out I would only have a sonogram performed this time. I was soooo happy! Whew...a sonogram- I can handle. The female doctor had no bedside manner, definitely no daughters..and may have had her vagina removed at one time another. She was so rough and cold. "turn left, cold gel", " turn right, cold gel"....you'd think she was rolling out pizza dough. She couldn't be sure whether or not the cyst she was seeing had fluid in it or not and wanted me to do another mammo....or in her words "just stick a needle in it". Wow.

I decided to call my gynecologist to get some advice from her. I had been going to her for close to 12 years and she delivered both of my children. I value and trust her opinion and knew she would steer me in the right direction. She advised me to see a well known breast surgeon in the area. I went to see her and was so glad I did. She was so kind and patient and definitely knew her stuff.

I was sent for additional mammos. I know- horrible. She recommended a wonderful place, Complete Woman's Imaging . It was night and day from the first place. I am so happy to say to you- this time the mammo wasn't that bad. The machines were more high tech. The apparatus would come down to meet the position of my breast rather than me standing on my toes and to the left in a crazy position like in the first place. There were two technicians in the room and this made a world of difference in addition to the updated machinery. One handled the fondling, the other the machine. This process worked out so much better because the two woman worked hand in hand together and this benefited my experience so much than the first time with one person.They were like pilot and co-pilot, navigating through my boobs and machine- hand signals and all! I will say it was still uncomfortable (I am my mothers daughter!). Whenever your boobs are being squashed like a pancake - a little discomfort is gonna occur! I also had another sonogram of both breasts that day- THAT DIDN'T HURT!

Right before Thanksgiving, I was told that the cyst was benign but had to be watched. I cried in the office. I cried on the way home. I was so happy that my kids wouldn't have to see their mommy sick. So happy that for now, I will be able to watch them grow. To take them to school, the beach, to the park. Given your health, your life...are the best words you can ever hear someone say to you.



If you are of age and haven't done so...please go schedule a mammogram. Ask friends and family where they go and about their experience. Call your doctor. Get a recommendation of where to go- it can make a huge difference.
                                                                                                                                                                    It happens. Breast cancer effects many young woman. Look at Guiliana Rancic. I may not be an E! news correspondent in the public eye- but even if one of you schedule an appointment- I know I could be helping someone. Early detection can save your life.

I will post the update of today's appointment. Wish me luck and please say a prayer for me. Xoxo.